Who knows what true happiness is… February 8, 2007
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Who knows what true happiness is, not the conventional word but the naked terror. To the lonely themselves, that wears a mask the most miserable outcast hugs some memory or some illusion.
So many things said in so little of the alphabet! True Happiness is something we all are terrified of,… terrified of losing,… terrified of getting,… To some the very thought of being so happy is troublesome…
It is the fear of what might go wrong next that constantly troubles the mind!
This is a fear that never satiates itself! The constant feeling that runs through my spine, untreated and unknown to the naked eye of others!
Trust… February 7, 2007
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Someone who thinks the world is always cheating him is right. He is missing that wonderful feeling of trust in someone or something.
Lately I’ve been more than happy to endorse this… People do not always gun to bring you down, and personally if someone did that to me I’d actually be quite happy and satisfied. After all there is something in me that the person cannot be. I mean look at it this way, there are numerous people around you that you do not like. People that you cannot stand, but then you only talk of some of them. We criticize a select few. Why is it that we gun for them? Maybe, we cannot stand them. Mostly I’d put that down to wanting to be that person!Well… all said and done this feeling of wanting to be someone else does not last forever. We see someone else, and then the entire cycle repeats for the other person!
So quite frankly the person forgets you, forgets all that they saw in you. And they move on.
Haven’t I deviated from what I wanted to say here? Maybe… Definitely!
But now coming to the point… if you feel people are continuously trying to pull you down, then there is probably something wrong and that you need to correct!
Personally I do not trust much. Lately though after trying to see things in new light I feel the world takes care of itself. And the “don’t trust anyone” on my shirt has been changed to “don’t fear anything”!
One has to either let go and not bother about what’s going on. Or one has to mould themselves to fit the society! Fit the definition of right! Fit what the opposite wants!
Another thing I’ve seen is that people communicate little when required. They talk a lot but there’s minimal communication. A small thing is blown out of proportion. A joke is not understood. The past is not forgotten. Positives are not appreciated. People are never perfect but they are worth a lot many things. Each has a latent talent. Each has a hidden thing to offer! And of course each has his own flaws. Try looking over those flaws and you will see a rosy picture!
Yes I know endorsing this is easier than actually implementing it. And maybe I might not be able to do it. I realize that! But to people who want to attain that perfection this is something that cannot be overlooked!
Nostalgia! January 10, 2007
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was going thru all my kidstuff to get some toys for a friend’s son … when i chanced upon a notebook i’d kept those days and all these years!! playing football on the road … and then in the house … writing down commentry and the scores of all of englands games .. and uniteds games in that stack of paper .. wow .. nostalgic!!!
playing alone acting like i was the next shearer … and the next gazza … the next baggio … gave me so much joy … having superstitions like needing to thread a proper thru ball thru the door at the perfect height before sitting for any test!!! those kind of things .. make me smile now!!
and today … i really cant see any contentment within me … racing alone .. trying to reach a finish line … and then searching for another finshin line … it just doesn’t stop … there is nothing i can do now that gives me as much pleasure as then … why is it ?? is it the same with all grown ups??
those days were so beautiful … so simple … makes me smile even today!!!
Calculation Techniques December 24, 2006
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I have already touched the topic about what i need to remember and learn for the MBA classes, and the topics covered in class. So will not go there.
This class was about self realisation. I had entered this class knowing I was good and had a good chance of making it thru, however after this class the realisation has dawned on me that it should in no way be taked for granted. It is like the youtube guys, having an escrow worth a billion dollars and 650 million change. But then it is not really the actual money yet, Right??!!
I literally stood last in class. I had answered all the questions during practice but when we did our 20 min test, got each decent question wrong. I am sure even those i got right were more likely to be flukes, and the next partI just lost all my confidence. It was over.
Lesson learnt I guess.
Protected: SWOT December 17, 2006
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Hello world! December 13, 2006
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So there is a saying in the computer world that one should start learning something with a very simple “hello world!” program .. its like an offering to the God..
Though this is not even closely related to programming, I shall do this out of habit.
Keep logged in!
Call this What??? June 10, 2006
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music is music! how can you call something blasphemous when you listen to it, buy it, or download it! just to fit in??
well okay he might not croon like a nightingale but Ido believe a voice like kailash kher or elton john for that matter would suit the songs he sings! yup you guessed it right, I’m talking of hummesh!
I myself am not the biggest fan of his but i feel for the guy! why blame him for creating music like that! if you do not like him dont listen to him, there are many others out there! but making fun of his style and cracking silly jokes for so long has just gone a bit too far!
People who criticise him should atleast thank him for some of the beatiest tracks today! you couldnt go to a disc and dance to rahman(most of) or ya ali .. staying on ya ali… its been picked up from an egyptian or iranian album this iranian friend of mine was hearing in the morning! and people say pritam is an awesome music director! atleast this guy is original!
I might not hear his songs forever and surely never burn his music to store in my favourites collection but I surely respect the guy for what he has achieved and given us (after all we want to hear such songs)
if hummy ever comes to read this .. keep the good work on .. but please let vineet sing your songs .. he clearly is a better singer 
.. wanna hear another controversial thing … I believe vineet is the best singer in the country today! .. better than sonu nigam or hariharan!.. I truly believe!
They asked WHY? June 3, 2006
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They asked him, “Why do you love her?”
“I do not know … I do not love maybe … I do not know …”
“Aren’t you being unfair? Are you playing her?”
“I don’t want to play her! No, I really don’t.”
“You’ve got that reputation haven’t you?”
“Oh! Noooo, not Again!!!”
“Then tell us, why?”
“Cos’ uhmmm … she loves me… I mean she said so … do not know!!!” He looks back; then again he looks them in the eye. “I like hanging out with her at times. Most times … nearly always!!! … She’s different … she’s lovely … I mean she’s not ‘lovely’ lovely …but she’s a confident independent person and not maudlin … and she’s a good friend.”
“So how long do you think its going to last?? C’mon you’re … you … and she is she … you both are poles apart!!”
“Maybe just maybe that’s why it will work out longer!!”
“N after that?? What do you do then??”
“Be friends … the way some of us turned out …its possible!!”
“Other than that once … you do know it’s next to impossible don’t you … its there in your tone … we just want you to think!!”
And he thought to himself … I’m not the bad guy they think I am … this will work …
The comfort died in 2 weeks … they needed different things … different levels of everything … they cared for each other … but differently … she was adorable … a ‘dream come true’ for any guy except probably this one!! Who was to blame??? Was there anyone to blame???
Two months …
… His friends came over with the same … ‘I told you!!!’ look.
OK, OK, At least I tried … and this time you have to agree it’s not my mistake … I just can’t put up with her!!! Its just so tuff!!
But these words would never come out … somehow he knew it was as much his mistake as hers!! Not that he could do anything about how they went about stuff … but he knew he should have foreseen this … it was always on the horizon … it wasn’t something that needed rocket science … they were two completely different people, opposite charges attract, opposite people do not!
“What do you want from me?” she always asked him … never did he have an answer to that question … it was the most difficult one to answer … he never wanted anything from anyone … he always thought … am I supposed to want something? …
He could spend hours with her … He could talk for hours … that was before she told him how she felt … before all of this happened … and these days there was calm … an uneasy one at that too … he never understood how it could change so soon!!! And why it should change too.
He was just too chicken to look far ahead and all she wanted was to look to the future … make plans … not his cup of tea.
He always prepared her for the time … somehow he knew it was not going to work out … but he did not want it to end either … should he tell her … he wasn’t sure …
People try so long and then they do not work out … sometimes it just isn’t meant to be … but then there is so much time to then … couldn’t they just stay together till then … instead of him going on to find someone else to repeat the same thing with …
He realized … it was just happening to him too often … somehow he could not attain that stability … that’s where he got that reputation …
6 billion … yet 1 January 14, 2006
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At any point there are
Over six billion people
Six billion souls
And sometimes all we need is one.
It’s true. Yes I’m the one saying this. Don’t worry, I’ve not turned senile! And I’ve not changed at all.
I still do not believe in love or for that matter anything like that. But yes everyone here needs one person. All it takes is one person to understand you. It makes life so much simpler. Just one person I can trust forever. Just one person who’d be there at all times with me. Someone, who’d always have my back, but the need of the moment is “trust”.
The basis of anything; absolutely anything, is trust.
And the most difficult thing to find in them all; the six and a quarter billion souls here, is that one thing we need most trust.
They all come so close, a hairs length away from the finish line. And then for whatever reason they cannot drag themselves the extra part. Is it really so hard to be true to someone!
What is it that you get out of hurting someone? Is happiness also conserved like energy?
Is it such a scarce quantity? Why can’t people see the repercussions of whatever they do!
Twisting people’s words and facts is so simple. And to some people it’s so enjoyable. The pleasure of life are actually not fleshly but “twisted”.
Re(aly)gion!! December 25, 2005
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What is religion???
According to the dictionary “religion is the service and worship of God or the supernatural.”
1 I challenge that definition. It is true that all religions do involve the worship of some supernatural force, however, it is also true that no religion in history has ever stopped at that. For a more complete definition of the word religion we also have to examine two other aspects. How has it affected man over the centuries? And what is the true motivation of its leadership? Some would have you believe that it has brought peace and harmony to the world and that its leaders are motivated by the service of their god.
I suggest that a more accurate definition of word would be as follows. Religion, a feudal system of government which uses fear, hate and sometimes lies to control and manipulate people for the betterment of a select group of individuals.
To better illustrate this point let’s look at just three of the countless examples that human history has to offer. The Inquisition, “judicial institution, established by the papacy in the Middle Ages, charged with seeking out, trying, and sentencing people guilty of heresy.”2 Heretics were considered enemies of the state. The penalty for heresy was torture and death. The crucifixion of Jesus Christ, “Jesus was taken to Golgotha and nailed to a cross, the Roman punishment for political offenders and criminals.”2 The Crusades, “The name Crusade (from Latin, “Cross”) was also applied, to the wars against pagan peoples, Christian heretics, and political foes of the papacy.”
2 All three examples illustrate how man has used God to justify his greed and quest for power. When the leadership was challenged, it used devine decree to justify the murder and torture of the innocent. We are expected to believe that a non-physical being order the religious leadership to aquire riches and land, often at the demise of the poor and helpless. The misuse of God isn’t limited to the Ancient world. Today we have people like Louis Farakahn and Adolph Hitler and David Koresch who use god to propagate racism and hate, there by giving them the power unite and control a given segment of the population.
As you can plainly see, religion is much more than the worship of a supernatural force as its leaders would have us believe. It is in fact, a method by which a society is governed and controlled. “God created man, man created religion, it is therefore corrupt.”
